Earlier today you may have thought you saw a post relating to what might have been the newest iteration of the ever popular IndyCar 2-seater. You know, the thing you can actually pay to ride around actual tracks and go like 180 mph while Davey Hamilton or Arie Luyendyk Jr. peels your face off and runs you right up next to the wall in every turn. It’s an unparalleled experience for both race fans as well as those who like to soil themselves involuntarily. Repeatedly.
Well, the ever vigilant legal department here at Silent Pagoda informed us that the picture you thought you saw here earlier today was MOST CERTAINLY NOT the new 2-seater. You didn’t see the new 2-seater because that wasn’t it. Not even close. What you saw was actually a concept ONE-seater, and not a good one at that because it was just a stylized graphical mock-up of a hypothetical idea that someone may or may not have had. In short, it was little more than a figment of your imagination.
So you didn’t see it. You. Did. NOT. See. It. You just didn’t. There was no car. There is no spoon. You know nothing. (Egads, people — that thing you DID NOT see didn’t even have two seats! IT HAD ONE. WHO posts a 2-seater article without a 2-seater??? Exactly. Nobody.)
Anyhow, we have been informed that there is a photo of the eagerly anticipated 2-seater available, but you have to look very quickly because we’ve been told we’re breaking like 16 copyright laws and for some reason this image threatens the stability of the Commonwealth of Kentucky, but no mind. Here it is – the REAL 2-seater.
Look quickly!
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
↓
It’s truly magnificent, is it not? Davey and Arie will love it!
Oh, by the way, don’t read anything into the fact that it’s me posting and not Roy Hobbson. It’s not like he’s being held in Donald Davidson’s office and being waterboarded by Security Chief Charles in an effort to reveal his source for the non-existent photo you never saw. If you heard that, well that’s pure and unmitigated nonsense. You DID NOT hear that. It would never happen.
But just in case it did, hypothetically, you can say a prayer for him if you want.
By pressdog, January 29, 2010 @ 11:57 pm
Hobbson is impervious to water boarding. He’s also immune to hives and has no heat-sensing taste buds. Lost them in a tragic fire-breathing accident. Back in his days as Circus Folk. Few people know that. Let’s speak no more of it.
By NaBUru38, January 30, 2010 @ 2:11 am
“What you saw was actually a concept ONE-seater, and not a good one at that because it was just a stylized graphical mock-up of a hypothetical idea that someone may or may not have had.”
Are you breaking legal agreements, Jeff? Doing that in your country is an extreme sport (because of the dangers it involves).
By cappy, January 30, 2010 @ 9:23 am
Yes – I. Saw. Nothing. *blinks*
By Carrie, January 30, 2010 @ 5:20 pm
I didn’t see that 1-seater like I didn’t see that three-breasted biker chick last night, right? RIGHT?!?
By al gore, January 30, 2010 @ 6:45 pm
I saw it.
By Bash, January 31, 2010 @ 3:39 am
I did (not) see it…in the basement (that doesn’t exist).
By CurlingRacer, February 1, 2010 @ 11:58 am
I too did (not) see this in the basement. It truly is (not) a piece of majestic innovation.
By Coz, February 1, 2010 @ 4:35 pm
Far out! Where can I get one? Do they have a special Bombardier Indy 500 version?